Monday, August 5, 2013

Invalidation!





It's been a theme on this blog.

Adult children of Narcissists are more then familiar with invalidation!

This is where what you say is ignored, mocked, censored, not valued, not listened to and worse!
My life as a child of narcissists was spent not being listened to and being told that all my feelings and emotions were invalid. "You don't really feel that way", "Nothing happened like that!", with plenty of gaslighting and worse in the mix. It's like being abused and being told to keep the smile on your face.

I think about the whole supersized obesity thing. Often being this fat is like being out in space, screaming with no one to hear you. Remember the saying "If a Tree Falls in a Forest Will It Make A Sound?" Everyone makes assumptions about you when you are this size. That you are lazy, that you have choose it, that you must go into the kitchen and scoop food into your face like a pig and how dare you for eating more calories then you burn even if your metabolism is sludge, and every day of your life, you have to spend hours with the stomach growling to hold back any eating to keep the calorie count low enough so you do not gain weight. You watch skinny people with smiles on their faces eat cookies, cake, and ice cream cones while you feel even worse about yourself.  They tell you to do all these things that SIMPLY DO NOT WORK!

Oh and to the "everything is a choice" crowd, forget it! That is what the elites love to tell the poor to keep them in their self-blaming cages as they send all the jobs overseas. That New Age "you choose your destiny" clap-trap is not going to fly here. I believe people should do what they can. This is why I walk even with the pain and knowing I will bloat up. This is why I have not given up, but your philosophies merely have put more pain on people and taken an erasure to any would-be empathy!

I think about how the entire world has ganged up NOT to listen to anyone who is fat. How fat people as a whole especially in the supersizes are ignored and how their reality is not LISTENED TO. What does this do to an entire group of people over a long span of time? Especially for a condition where a bunch of smug types think they are morally superior to you?

"Below are a few of the many ways we are invalidated:
We are told we shouldn't feel the way we feel
We are dictated not to feel the way we feel
We are told we are too sensitive, too "dramatic"
We are ignored
We are judged
We are led to believe there is something wrong with us for feeling how we feel"
The invalidation of fat people as a whole is why the "fight against the obesity epidemic" is failing. if the default position is that all fat people are liars, whose going to be listened to in that senario? Again I ask, why isn't anyone dealing with the increased hunger or even desire for food? Even a few of the honest have admitted the corporations are putting addictive BLISS points in food. Get a clue people, when 40% of the population is fat and many more are joining them, you can't claim everyone is an overeating human trash can! You have invalidated people.


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